


(When drunk) Kanda is dangerous(ly clingy)

by SatansLollipop



Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Allen is fed up with all of them, Daisya and Allen are partners in crime, Daisya tries being matchmaker and fails spectacularly, Kanda is clingy, Kanda is compared to a teddy bear, Lavi is also clingy, M/M, Or not
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-15
Updated: 2018-08-15
Packaged: 2019-06-27 20:37:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15692946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SatansLollipop/pseuds/SatansLollipop
Summary: "Well, for us it's damn great entertainment. Stay out of the way and watch, you'll see."Allen gets the feeling there'll be a lot more he'll be doing that night than "see". Potentially something like "running for his life".Or, Kanda is clingy when drunk and Lavi has no self-preservation skills whatsoever.(It is all Daisya's fault and no one is surprised.)





	(When drunk) Kanda is dangerous(ly clingy)

For the record, Allen had thought that this was a bad idea. It came nowhere near the scale of horrific and absolutely unmentionable ideas they'd come up with before in the past - the four of them combined were a ticking bomb waiting to explode - but it was still a bad idea nonetheless. And he hadn't been shy about his opinion, oh no - in fact he had shouted at them with a bullhorn that  _this is a horrible, horrible idea why are you doing this_  - not that it had stopped them. 

Which was why he was currently plastered to the edge of the bar, staring with apprehension at the sea of people rocking to the beat of music so loud it he swore he could feel his hair standing on end and wondering what he had ever done to deserve this.

Lenalee had melted into the crowd the moment they had gotten there with a cheery back wave and as much as Allen knew Komui would have his head if anything happened to Lenalee, there was absolutely no way he was ever going to brave that crowd. And anyway he had seen Lenalee take down five gigantic hunks who probably had peanuts for brains with a few well-aimed kicks, leaving them groaning in pain courtesy of her killer high-heels. She would be fine.

Allen, on the other hand, was not. What had he done to deserve this again?

"New meat, eh?" Come a voice from behind him and Allen jumps, nearly losing his balance from where he was precariously balancing at the edge of the bar. Righting himself, he turns to glare at the bartender, a young man with a hood covering his head and what looked like purple makeup resembling fangs under his eyes. Creepy.

The bartender grins at him like he's accustomed to glares and cheerfully tips his head in direction of the crowd. "Your friends dumped you?"

Allen scowls self consciously. "Not dumped, I just...lost them." The bastards.

Purple-fangs peers at him, squinting in deep thought and after a long while of awkwardness - mostly on Allen's part - mutters under his breath. "Moyashi."

"WHAT!?" Now, this was just plain mean. Just because Kanda - that insufferable jerk - and Lavi called him Moyashi, was everyone going to call him that? Did he really resemble a beansprout that much?

The other laughs and waves his hands, chucking under his breath. "Knew it! White hair, red scar, short... you're the moyashi Yuu's been talking about, yeah?"

"You?" Allen's not sure he's ever been this confused in his life. Except that one time when he was nine and walked in on Cross doing questionable stuff, but let's not go there.

"Yuu," Purple-fangs repeats, then seems to understand his confusion. "Yuu Kanda, long haired, bad-tempered, trigger-happy - know someone like that?"

"Oh," Allen scowls. "Him."

Then does a double-take. "Kanda talks about  _me_?"

"More like ranting and raving. Complaining. Something like that." He grins. "You frustrate him to no end. Only person he complains more about is the rabbit, and with him it isn't so much as complaining than pining, you get it?"

Allen assumes the "rabbit" must be Lavi. And no, he does not get it.

The bartender takes his scowl as a yes then seems to realise that Allen still has no idea whatsoever who he is and leans forward over the bar, holding an arm out. "Nice t'meet cha. Daisya Barry, Kanda's foster brother."

Allen stares. Ah, that explains the high immunity to death-glares.

Daisya raises an eyebrow. "Yuu didn't tell you I worked here?" So that was why Kanda absolutely refused to come here, much like Allen not that he feels any sympathy at all, and only came after Mugen was threatened. 

Allen takes the hand, regretting it immediately afterwards because Daisya shakes it with enthusiasm to rival Lavi's, meaning he basically nearly shakes his arm out of it's socket where he would prefer it to stay.

"He didn't even tell me he had a brother. Foster brother. Whatever." Allen pauses in thought. "I actually thought he was kind of the personification of anger or something. Not sure who could manage to raise someone like that or, hell, be with Kanda for more than five minutes without wanting to throw him off a cliff."

"Nah, you'll get used to it after a while. Yuu can be sweet when he wants to be, he's just a bit angry sometimes; kinda like a big teddy bear with a sword."

Allen tries not to faint. Teddy bear? Kanda? Dear lord, he was probably going to have nightmares of a teddy bear with Kanda's face and a sword trying to lop off his head forever.

"And it's not just me, actually." He gestures to the side. "Marie's Kanda' foster brother too. Old man Tiedoll adopted the three of us."

Allen turns and jumps at the sight of a well-built powerhouse with headphones that he recognises as the bouncer standing directly next to him. He hadn't heard a thing. 

Then again, these people were raised along with Kanda and  _thought he was like a goddamn teddy bear for akuma's sake_ , who knew who messed up they were.

"Noise Marie."

Allen shakes his hand and suddenly grins, devil horns and tail sprouting out and black aura of evilness cloaking around him as a thought hits him suddenly. 

Foster brother, huh. "Hey...mind telling some...interesting stories about Kanda?" 

Oho, that bastard was gonna get it.

Daisya grins too, his smirk matching Allen's eerily. "Why not?"

(For Allen and Daisya, un)Fortunately before any acts of evilness could be committed though, a cheerful shout reaches them and Allen nearly falls off his chair as Lavi slings an arm across his shoulder and jumps into the seat next to his. "Daisya, man, long time no see! And you've met moyashi already!"

"It's Allen." Allen mutters dejectedly to nobody in particular. They both ignored him.

"Where's Yuu?"

Daisya gestures towards the other end of the bar, where said man was huddled in the darkest corner, bent over a drink. Oh, so that's where the grump was. "Couldn't stand the crowd, couldn't stand the moyashi, so he's all cooped up over there. Lucky people have the sense to avoid him, it'll be hell if someone tries to hit on him  _again_." Allen can see why, considering the Japanese male has a cloud of thunder hanging over his head.

The redhead makes to go over and likely drag the man over here but Daisya holds him back with an arm on his shoulder. "Careful, he's drunk, and," Here he cracks a grin. "You's seen how he is when he's drunk..."

If anything, Lavi's grin widens and Allen get's the feeling of impending doom that usually comes before he has to run for his life or witness life-traumatic scenes that he seriously needs brain bleach for.

"Never seen it!" Lavi chirps."But I bet he's all grumpy and pouty. Gotta see it!"

Daisya lets go with a cheerful smile. Way too cheerful. The kind that says  _you have no idea what deep shit you're going into and I'm gonna sit here and laugh my head off at you_.

He looks at the bartender who is watching Lavi with a shit-eating grin. Daisya must have caught his questioning look, because he turns and explains.

"Yuu used to have a high alcohol tolerance, but then there was this period where he went and drunk a lot so he gets drunk so much easier now, and when he gets drunk..." He trails off, then shrugs. "Well, for us it's damn great entertainment. Stay out of the way and watch, you'll see."

Allen gets the feeling there'll be a lot more he'll be doing that night than "see". Potentially something like "running for his life".

Again he ponders whether it'll be worth it to run off and risk being teased forever by Lavi for chickening out over possible life trauma.

He stayed.

Bad choice.

 

Daisya's been working part-time at night as a bartender for a long time, he needs funds for soccer after all, and he can say that he knows a lot more about some people than he should. 

There are many kinds of drunks, and they usually are the exact opposite of the person if they were sober. There are the uptight, stick-up-their-asses drunks who are real boring, the depressing - most common, he notes, real pain in the ass - sad people who sob their heads off about their job and wife and just about everything that has gone wrong in their life (which apparently are a lot), the hysterical maniacs, the rowdy, angry, reckless ones that he usually lets Marie deal with and, god forbid, there are the clingy ones.

Yuu Kanda, his foster brother, has always been a combination of the uptight, stick-up-his-ass kind and the angry, trigger-happy kind when sober. There are times, rare moments, when he actually slumps and starts talking depressing stuff which he only does with a few people. 

Daisya is proud that he is one of them - no matter how annoying Yuu thinks he is sometimes, the other knows he can keep a secret.

He actually kind of assumes that alcohol would probably make Yuu even more uptight and rigid instead of loosening up, but no, god just liked surprising him, because Yuu was, of all thing, the  _clingy_  type. Clingy.

Even now, he has the urge to hysterically laugh whenever he thinks about it, because,  _Yuu_ and  _clingy_? Don't belong in the same sentence unless the latter was to describe Lavi clinging onto his self-proclaimed best friend.

And the worst part? Yuu doesn't get hangovers - he's still jealous - but he doesn't forget stuff either. And usually, after every time Daisya or someone else gets him drunk, he stays holed up in his room for a few days in which Tiedoll worries his hair out over him, because he remembers every single fucking thing he did and most are really humiliating, embarrassing stuff that he would never be caught dead even thinking about when sober.

Which makes the teasing so much more fun.

So he doesn't hesitate at all to pour in a whole lot of the strongest vodka there is in the beer Kanda asks for. This is going to be fun.

He stops to watch carefully - screw what the boss says about him slacking off - as Lavi skips over to Yuu, visibly sparkling, who is still slumped over the table so much that it's hard to tell where the table ends and Yuu starts.

And Daisya - along with that moyashi that got Yuu all riled up, he can already tell that the boy is gonna join him and Lavi in the Annoy Yuu club - sits back to watch the show. (Well, he's standing, but technicalities don’t matter)

This is going to be interesting.


End file.
